Having Questions on Your Sexuality?
I knew something was wrong the minute I sat down across the table from Jenny. She hadn’t touched the onion rings in front of her. Her eyes were red, too. Continue reading
Homosexual people most often do not know that they are homosexuals right away. Many times, as a person enters their teen years and hormonal changes are occurring, a teen may struggle with the many overpowering sexual feelings they are having. It is at this time that some teens may wonder if they are gay or lesbian. Sometimes, if a teen just has a fleeting sexual thought of someone of the same sex, they will jump to the conclusion that this means they must be homosexual. This is not the case. Having some random thoughts does not make a person homosexual. There are many adults who are straight and will have random thoughts their whole lives. If a person does think that they are homosexual, they should not feel guilty or that they are ‘bad’ in any way. Many people agree with the theory that a person does not choose to be homosexual, they are simply born with this trait. Likewise, it is wise to never treat homosexuals with prejudice. They are just people who are struggling with life’s issues just like everyone else.
I knew something was wrong the minute I sat down across the table from Jenny. She hadn’t touched the onion rings in front of her. Her eyes were red, too. Continue reading
When you come out to someone who doesn’t know much about homosexuality, the first question they’ll probably ask you is, “How do you know you’re gay?” Continue reading
Homosexuals are emotionally and/or physically attracted to persons of the same sex. It sounds like a simple, straight-forward definition, but what if you are strongly attracted to your own sex but don’t act on it, does that make you a homosexual? What if you seek affection with one sex but physically desire sexual activity with the other? What if you are sexually attracted to both sexes? What if consciously you have only heterosexual thoughts and actions but unconsciously desire sex (or relationships) with the same sex? You can see that this labeling problem could become complicated. Continue reading
Homophobia means the fear–and often hatred–of gay or lesbian people. As an out lesbian, I have addressed that fear many times. I have soothed anxious parents of gay teens and reassured angry protestors that I, nor any other gay person I know, has any intention of interfering with their day to day lives. Yes, sometimes I get tired of educating and explaining. Some days it would be bliss to scream back at the protestors and return hate for hate. But I know their hate is born of fear and just might, with the correct information, someday transform into indifference or even love. So I continue to educate. This article examines some of the myths that cause people to hate and fear gays and lesbians. Continue reading
As little as ten years ago, the news that one’s teen was gay or lesbian was one of the worst things parents thought they could hear. There are still all too many gay or lesbian teens who become throwaways–tossed out of their own homes for the “crime” of loving a member of their own sex. In many circles, however, this attitude of horror has become one of tolerance–or even indifference. Many parents now think they can cope with a gay or lesbian teen, but what about a bisexual one? For many families, bisexuality is far more difficult to understand than homosexuality. This article deals with common questions parents of bisexual teens ask. Continue reading
“I kissed a girl!” Someday, your teenage daughter might drop that bombshell in the middle of a peaceful breakfast, a conversation about something else entirely, or even a knock-down-drag-out fight. How you handle her disclosure can make a big difference in your relationship. These simple tips can help you get past your daughter’s revelation and may even bring your relationship closer than it has ever been.
She was beautiful, with blonde hair done up in a bun and a stunning floor-length dress that shimmered when she moved. I watched her, breathless, already half-hating the man who would meet her and sweep her off her tiny, glass clad feet. Why not a woman? I thought bitterly. Why not a connection with the gender that has loved and cared for her so gently since birth? Why a man?
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Deciding to come out of the closet is scary for most people. It’s human nature to worry about all the things that could possibly go wrong. Unfortunately, it’s also human nature to “catastrophize,” in other words to imagine a negative outcome and take it to ridiculous lengths. For instance, to think “My landlord will find out, and he’ll evict me, and no one else will rent me an apartment, so I’ll end up penniless and on the streets” is catastrophizing. This article looks at some negative consequences people do face when they come out of the closet, and suggests ways to handle them to reduce the hurt and damage.
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Some straight women imagine that lesbian relationships are pure bliss. They remember how well they got along with their best friends and think that every day must be filled with shared feelings and every night must be a joyful slumber party. Think again. We lesbians know that our relationships, like any other relationships, must be carefully tended, cared for, and worked on. We have many of the same fears and concerns as straight couples, and a few extra that are unique to our relationships. This article examines five top lesbian fears, explores why they send terror through us, and offers suggestions for neutralizing these fears.
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What are the implications of sexual fantasies? I found out that my husband has homosexual fantasies and has been exploring them on the Internet. He says he is not gay, but the issue bothers me.